Enjoy..

Enjoy the spring wind that swipes through the fields and make the grass sway..enjoy it’s gentle touch on your face as it calls out the freckles from their hideaways Enjoy the summer breeze as it dries the pearls of sweat on your forehead on a hot day.. Enjoy the autumn wind as it plays with the fallen, golden leaves along the road… Enjoy the cold winter wind that cuts through snowy rooftops desperately trying to find a way to get under your furry coat… Enjoy the sunshine as it motivates you to be adventurous, it urges you to go and explore..let it be a moorland, a forest, or just a nice pub with a garden… Enjoy the wind as it is change.. bringing with itself freshness, blowing away old things..allowing you to start something new.. Enjoy the rain as it keeps the meadows green..enjoy the light summer shower…go out and dance, let the raindrops wash away your worries, cleanse your soul and fill you with renewed energy....enjoy the autumn rain as it makes you find time for yourself whilst you get snug at home with a cup of tea.. Enjoy the winter for it creates a special atmosphere..enjoy the heat radiating from the fireplace, the smell of mulled wine, and the sound of crackling wood… Enjoy the love that surrounds you…enjoy time spent with your family and friends.. Enjoy sports..enjoy walking…enjoy driving through the beautiful countryside…enjoy traveling Enjoy the smells…of a delicious dinner…of a nice cup of coffee…of a flower…of a perfume…of the crops..the hay…the steam after a heavenly shower on a hot summer day… Enjoy reading…enjoy learning…enjoy working…enjoy the challenges…enjoy your successes and don’t let your “failures” let you down..for those are not failures, but lessons from life that will make you stronger, wiser…better… Enjoy dancing…enjoy singing…enjoy watching a movie.. Enjoy being with people, and enjoy being alone…for you are never really alone, and yet always alone Enjoy the fog for it wraps the world in mystery… Enjoy the music for it makes the soul celebrate and your heart dance… Enjoy the night…the stars…the moon…your dreams.. Enjoy the mountains, the valleys, the plateaus, the hills, the deserts… There are so many things to enjoy…and yet it’s so easy for people to dwell on things they are not satisfied with, and be miserable instead (I’m no exception, however at least trying)…but the thing is…satisfaction does not depend on anything else, but us… one can look for it everywhere, but it can only be found within ourselves..If one wants to find joy, one will….it’s only a matter of choice…

Scents...

The older I grow, the more I contemplate about the events of my life..it’s not to say that I’m living in the past, but when I have a bit of time, I like to think about all the things, moments I’ve lived through, places I’ve been to, and people I’ve met… and I can’t help it, but I often wonder, if it’s possible to remember everything. I’m inclined to think that everything that’s happened to me, every page I read, every conversation I had, every eye contact I’ve made with strangers…even those moments that seemed insignificant at the time, must be stored somewhere in the labyrinth of my brain, I just can’t access it…can’t recall it…and exactly for this reason, I became doubtful, whether my memory really clings on to these moments. But today I’ve discovered something in connection to the above…I’ve realized how important scents are for me..how certain scents automatically draw an image linked to a memory of mine from the depths of my brain…memories that I’ve thought have long disappeared in the abyss.. I’m not sure how it all came about, but today, after a nice lie in, I was walking towards town, when all the sudden a scent of an intense, sweet perfume struck me. There was no one around me, and yet for the fraction of a second I could feel that somehow familiar fragrance overwhelming my nose, and making me smile. Yes, it made me smile, because just as the scent materialised, a picture conjured up in my mind as well, right away…as if the scent and this picture belonged together, creating an atmosphere I’ve well known at one time in my life. The scent I’ve detected was identical to the scent of my mom’s perfume a few years ago. I was much younger then… thinking nothing of the world…not knowing what I want, or what the future holds….and yet I was happy. I felt secure, loved, and certain that life is a miracle. Even though this scent was attached to one particular picture (my mom coming home from shopping, stepping in to the house, and giving me a hug) it contained a whole lot more. As if that little moment was a complete universe in itself, containing all my emotions at the time, my visions, my dreams, and the whole world through my eyes. And today, reliving this moment…that special atmosphere, delivered to me on the wings of the powerful Northern wind, brought me immense joy…joy, and a bit of confusion as well. Because today is different…I see the world through more experienced eyes, and maybe I feel more insecure…maybe I feel a little bit more lonely…maybe it’s because I’m far away from my family and home…but I felt like I would have liked to travel back to that moment..that moment, which at the time seemed somewhat insignificant, yet- my heart knowing it’s value – got stored deep down within me. This experience, this unexpected meeting with a special moment of the past evoked by a scent made me dreamy and greedy at the same time. The unique nature of the encounter filled my senses, my mind and my heart and I wanted more….so I’ve started rummaging amongst my memories..in search of anything that could be linked to a certain scent..and to my biggest surprise I’ve found plenty! I’ve closed my eyes, whilst sitting on the bench next the wee fishing pond I normally visit on a Saturday, and there they were. All these scents that can’t be well described by a single word…one needs to see behind the scenes…one needs to understand the magical works of nature to be able to understand them, and feel them in their completeness. The scent of spring…one would think it’s the blooming of the flowers covering fields and forests with an enchanted, fragranced blanket…and to be fair partly it is… but for me…for me the scent of the spring is the raw, somehow moist, woody flavoured fragrance of trees…the scent that one can only detect if one is very attentive, even though the fragrance is really distinctive. It’s bound to be, because it embodies the awakening of nature…through this scent you can become part of nature’s renewal..when you let this scent you’re your lungs, you’ll be able to peek under the barks and see..but not only see…FEEL how the fluids – after a long winter – start to flow faster, carrying life in a hasted manner from the roots to the crown breathing the joy of existence to every cell within the tree. You’ll feel the freshness, the pure, intoxicating, ancient jubilation of life pulsating in and around you. You’ll feel that despite of anything that occupies your mind..you’ll feel it, because one has to react when presented with such a powerful burst of raw energy… Scents are magical tools…no one should underestimate their power…

I took the one less traveled by...

A good friend reminded me, that it's about time I've returned to the realms of writing, and through writing sharing, and creating memories which will mark certain milestones of my life, making it easy (and hopefully fun) to trace back how I've dealt with life if once I grow old.... This friend is right, it's been too long...but for my defense..I've been gathering inspiration! Yet, it may very well be, that this "episode" of the "book" will not be so descriptive in nature..but rather philosophical... Why is that? Well because I've just thrown away my old life and started something completely new...and I guess such significant changes always make one halt..and think..all the impulses of the new life, all the challenges, doubts, questions, uncertainties whirling in one's head, mixed with a hint of loneliness and instability just crave for settling down with the hope in one's heart, that at least one will be able to give a frame to the new picture that is yet still forming...day after day, new colours are being added and who knows when a capturable theme will become visible...Strange, I've always longed to be spontaneous and easy going, and when my world is upside down, I can't help it...I'm craving for some...at least some structure! My old life was really pleasant..I can't complain about it...I lived in a city I knew well, and felt comfortable in...I worked for a company that treated me right...I was surrounded by wonderful friends who brought me joy and fun, never letting me sinking into the slimey hole of boredom...I felt great, the only frustration being that time went by so quickly..I could not keep up with it. I had a lovely family, supporting me, looking after me...I'd go home every second weekend to visit them, and we'd go for long and marvellous walks, that would energize and prepare me for the coming week. I thought I've figured life out! I thought I've reached my goals, and regarding the ones that were still a way away, I felt rather sure, that by careful and attentive planning I'll manage to book them too. My days became predictable in a sense, rarely would I have to face diversions from the "usual" and if yes, I'd still be comfortable with such "alterations to the plan" as I'd know how to deal with such "anomalies". I've calmed down, and thought I knew what life has in store for me..which is strange for someone in her 30s..it would rather characterize someone in her 70s...The thing is, that somehow, I've accepted that there won't be a sudden miracle...I won't win the lottery (even though I've never really given up hope)...and I won't change my life radically...I thought my life line resembles a rather straight line, and I've grown accustomed to it...I've learned to handle it, and adjust my whole being to it. I've planned to follow the straight line, get a mortgage, buy a flat, and tie myself to my company for another 20 years. And yet, sometimes, on a starry night when the crickets would be playing their sweet music I could not help to let the little doubt force his way to the frontier of my mind...questioning me, whether I'm really doing the right thing by choosing to accept, that this is my life...the small voice would ask me, whether it's not just a form of escape, or someone giving in...But I was clever! Ohh I was...I've explained the tine squeeling voice that in case I did not like my current state of being, and did not do anything about it, it would be giving in, but since I like my current state of being, it's not giving in, it's accepting, moreover it's a happy acceptance! But then...all these articles in random newspapers and books kept crossing my way...and they were all about changes...that when the time comes one needs to be courageous and embrace the changes...because life is about changes..it's like a river flowing freely, travelling through mountains and valleys, forming everything that gets in her way...life is never fix..no one moment in life is the same, and if one is unable to react to changes...seize the opportunity hidden in them, the person is likely to get stuck and without realizing cease to really live...So I thought about it...what if an opportunity for a change came, and it impacted my life? Well..it sent shivers down my spine... Stepping out of my comfort zone, leaving everything behind that gave me stability and security, plunging in to the unknown, being reborn if you like, was not something I've fancied...and at that point I have not even mentioned the risks yet...when most of my life I've been trying hard..very hard, to avoid the risks...I thought, despite of all the wisdom of those masters and teachers going on about the significance of changes, it's still not for me...and I felt good for being able to explain myself why I'm right about detesting to take on the challenges of change..but I also felt miserable because I thought myself to be a coward, and the chance of new doors (potentially leading to a magical new world) being opened by taking on the ris tickled my mind. Something deep down was trying to convince me that when one says yes to a challenge, the Universe will be by her side, helping her, and eventually she will harvest the ripen fruits of the hard work it takes to choose the road less traveled by... Because the choice can be compared to 2 roads...Where the roads take you to, it's unknown..and that's the only common thing in them..in all other aspects they differ. One is nice and wide, straight, with flowers on each side, crossing through green fields as far as the eyes can see..it's seemingly secure and very lovely. The other one however is curvy, rocky, and after a few meters leads into a vast, stern, majestic, thick forest...Many would say, taking the risk, and choosing the forest is silly, because it's unforeseeable what threats the forest might contain...and yet I think it is worth trying...why? Because by choosing that, one is able to conquer one's own fear, and whilst tackling/overcoming the challenges of the road one will grow in faith and character and through experience will obtain the key of wisdom opening the secret doors of the Universe. I'm not saying however that the nice road is a bad option..for some it will bring satisfaction, and completion...but it won't reveal the key of wisdom...because one can only learn through mistakes..(good or bad) decisions..one can only grow if one is stimulated by challenge...and the way how one deals with challenge is the key to develop in character and get enriched by wisdom. I did not take the easy road...and I know there are and will be times when I'll regret it, like now, when I'm crossing the vast and dark forest without any indication of it ever opening to a plateau bathed in sunsine...but as long as my heart is filled with faith, hope and love I shall not surrender... I shall renew my strength, find patience and trust that I'm walking the path I meant to walk...And if not? Then at least I've tried, and I won't have to be afraid that once, when I'll choose the "easy" road I won't be able to value its beauty and will take it for granted after a few miles (when I got used to the spectacular view of flowers and lush green fields), because I'll always have the memory of a much more unpredictable road...one less traveled by.